How to develop chemistry with a Japanese guy?
Amanda writes, “I’m wondering if there are any flirting techniques that are unique to Japan. I’m American, and I know full well about flirting with clever word play, playful touches, innuendos, etc., but I’m wondering how attraction and flirting happen in Japan? I’m currently living and working in Japan and I recently met a guy at my job. During the work day, he would often visit me and we make easy conversation. I asked him out first with some friends (karaoke!) and then alone for lunch. I’m interested in him and I want to send him the right messages and intensify his interest in me without being weird or stepping on a cultural faux pas. Our next meet-up is in a week or so, and I’d really like to make a good impression so please help me out! His English isn’t fluent, but it’s very, very good…lucky me since my Japanese is only at the beginner level! Also, he is no longer at my workplace since he was there only temporarily.”
How to charm a Japanese guy?
It looks like so far you are doing good because things seem to have progressed well. Here are things to think about in improving your chances, though, they aren’t all necessarily about flirting but more about developing chemistry.
- Be patient.
- Unless it is something really offensive or you would absolutely not like to do it, try not to say No. In case there is something that requires a firm No, be polite and sweet about it rather than how we would treat someone here at home. While Japanese are known to make unusual requests, they are also very understanding.
- Dress well for the date. I know there are all kinds of Japanese guys but chances are that when you get a good outfit and makeup going, it will send him the message that you value the time spent with him.
- Other than that, be yourself. He does not expect you to be a Japanese or act like one.
